Navigating the Balance: Addressing Misogyny Without Alienating Boys

The recent government plans to treat extreme misogyny as a form of terrorism underscore a critical step in addressing violence against women and girls (VAWG). It is undeniable that the rise in extreme misogynistic ideologies, especially those promoting them online, poses a significant threat. However, as we navigate this complex issue, it is equally important to ensure that our efforts do not inadvertently stigmatise or alienate boys and young men, many of whom are grappling with their own challenges in an increasingly polarised world.

The proposal to include extreme misogyny under the counter-terrorism strategy is a strong signal of how seriously this issue is being taken. The toxic influence of some figures online, and the rise of online ‘incel’ (involuntary celibates) subcultures, have shown how easily harmful ideologies can spread among vulnerable individuals. The focus on radicalisation and the links between these misogynistic views and broader patterns of extremism are both timely and in some cases necessary.

However, while these measures are crucial for safeguarding women and girls, they must be implemented with careful consideration of the broader impact on young boys and men. The line between addressing harmful ideologies and inadvertently making boys feel like potential perpetrators needs to be treated carefully. 

Many boys today are growing up in a world where traditional notions of masculinity are being challenged, and sometimes outright rejected. They are often caught between conflicting messages about what it means to be a man in modern society. In this context, it’s essential that we offer guidance and support rather than suspicion and blame. The aim should be to educate and empower boys to recognise and reject harmful behaviours, rather than making them feel like they are under constant scrutiny simply by being a man.

The importance of addressing the root causes of misogyny cannot be overstated. This includes tackling issues connected to unhealthy masculine views and opinions, which can manifest in harmful ways when boys and men feel their identities are under threat. But to do so effectively, we must also create spaces where boys can explore their identities and emotions in healthy, constructive ways. We must teach them to challenge harmful stereotypes and behaviours while also affirming their own worth and potential.

Moreover, education should focus on fostering empathy, respect, and understanding between genders. It’s about teaching boys that strength lies in kindness, that respect for others is a fundamental part of being a man, and that their value is not diminished by rejecting unhealthy misogynistic ideals. By doing so, we can help prevent the radicalisation of boys into harmful ideologies without making them feel targeted or vilified.

Preventing misogyny from taking root should not involve a blanket approach that risks alienating half of our young population. Instead, it should be about building a society where everyone, regardless of gender, feels valued and understood. Boys and young men should be seen as allies in the fight against misogyny, not as potential threats. They need to be included in the conversation, not marginalised by it.

While the government’s efforts to address extreme misogyny are necessary, it is vital that these efforts are balanced with an understanding of the broader implications for boys and young men. 

We must ensure that in our quest to protect women and girls, we do not inadvertently create a generation of boys who feel victimised or alienated. The goal should be to create a society where respect, empathy, and understanding prevail, and where everyone, regardless of gender, can thrive.

Written by: Richard Pomfrett – Boyz-2-Men

Photo by Dawid Zawiła on Unsplash